The True Cost of a Memoir

At seventy-one, with grown children in their forties and grandchildren I adore, you might think I’d be content to rest in the comfort of family, faith, and coastal sunsets. For decades, I carried the desire to write about Albany—my childhood, the oilfields, the courthouse square, the long Texas summers that shaped me. When I finally sat down to write, that’s the story I thought would come.

But the writing had other plans. One memory opened the door to another, and soon I was face to face with truths I had never intended to put on paper. What began as a love letter to my hometown became something larger: a story of silence, survival, and ultimately, redemption. I didn’t chase this book; it found me.

People often ask about the cost of publishing a book. Yes, there are the practical expenses: editors, formatters, cover designers, ISBNs, printing. Those matter. But for me, the real cost was something far deeper.

The Emotional Cost

Writing this memoir meant opening doors I had long kept closed. I sat at my desk reliving memories of fear, betrayal, and silence. My hands shook at times. My nights stretched long. The toll was not in dollars but in tears.

The Relational Cost

Telling the truth carries a price. Some relationships wished I had stayed quiet. Others questioned my memories. The cost of truth is never theoretical; it shows up in relationships, sometimes in painful ways. I have learned to leave the door open, to trust grace, and to keep telling the truth even when it comes at a personal cost.

The Spiritual Cost

From the beginning, I trusted God with this story. I never doubted whether writing was disobedient — only whether I could bear the weight of what it demanded. Many times I’ve asked Him, “Why is the cost so high?” I’ve prayed that if this book is not part of His plan for my life, He would close the doors and slam them shut. But the doors have stayed open, even as the toll has been heavy—not only on me, but on KM as well.

The Reward

The writing may have come quickly, but the story was born of a lifetime. And though the cost has been heavy, truth is always worth it. Each page has been an offering, a way of trusting God with both the past and the future, believing that what He brings into the light, He can also redeem.